Friday, June 16, 2006

A Happy Heart

Things are looking up here at Willems Central.

Everybody is getting over being sick. This means that the constantly running noses only spurt out the odd gobs of goobers. Unfortunately Ben has a habit of wiping his nose on his hands and since he is such a clean freak he then wipes his hands... all over the place. It's actually pretty revolting, but what can you do?

Sam's thrush is completely gone. This means no more purple medicine which also means no more sores in his mouth! YAY! He seems to be coming out of the worst of things. Lenore, a lovely lady from our church, (Hi Lenore!) was over today to hold Sam for me and we both agreed that he seems to be more happy and relaxed than he was last week when she was here. I really think the colic might be a thing of the past very soon.

Mom and Dad are coming for a visit this weekend. Dad plans to tear down the junky greenhouse in our backyard and maybe put a railing on our deathtrap of a deck. Mom plans (I'm pretty sure) to hold Sam and play with Ben. I can't wait.

Glen's Mom is coming to help while he has final exams. For those of you who aren't teachers or who don't live with teachers you might not understand what a big deal this is for us. Usually, during final exams Glen is at school all day, all evening, and till 2 or 3 am every night. It's crazy and I don't know how I would have survived all alone here. I know single moms do it all the time, but I am not cut out for that life.

Yes, things are definitely looking up. I have this light feeling in my heart that hasn't been there for a while. It's nice. I think a big part of feeling better has been feeling like I am not all alone in this. There are some very special people who have taken time out of their lives to help me muddle through mine. (I won't mention names though, Trish, Darcie, Kara, Lenore and Fae Lynn.) Could I have survived without them? Probably, but I might not have this feeling down deep that life is good and the world is a happy place.

This got me thinking. Shouldn't I be able to depend on God alone to get that feeling? Shouldn't God's friendship be all I need to make me feel loved and cared for? How can I possibly feel like I am all alone when I know for a fact that God cares and He is right here beside me? I've been wondering this for a while now and mostly just been feeling guiltier and guiltier because it seems like maybe God is not enough for me.

Finally, Today I got my answer. While Lenore was visiting with Sam and Ben while I tidied my kitchen I realized, or maybe God told me, something. God designed me. Just like a car is designed to need gasoline to run, part of my design is my hearts desire for human companionship. No one would expect their car to function without gas and God doesn't expect me to function without the people I love. He wants me to depend on Him, but part of that is accepting the love he sends my way through my friends. So today I am filled with gratitude for my beautiful friends and family, but also for a God who knows I need them and sends them my way... Just to make me happy.

4 comments:

  1. It is so good to have the blessing of true friends. It sounds like you have very special people in your life and that is wonderful. It is also good to hear that things are looking up at your house. Ours is a bit caotic right now, Robyn is actually in the hospital and I am playing mommy. I will post all about it when I know more. Hopefully today.

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  2. Good to hear you and your family are feeling better. Having friend around you sure helps.

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  3. it's so great to have people who love you enough to do something big or small that can affect your life in such a huge way...
    you are very lucky to have the friends & family that you do...
    that's a blessing, and a GIFT from God - don't feel bad for accepting it.

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  4. Aww, I'm very happy for you Becky. I also love that God is okay with what we need, even when it's not him directly. I'm glad you're able to accept the love of God through the people he uses to bring it to you. I mean, he could send an angel to hold Sam and one to tidy your kitchen, but other than the cool experience of an angel doing your dishes, isn't it nicer to have it be someone you love and can repay when they're in a crisis? I'm glad God came through for you in such a real way, it's really encouraging for me to read about too! Thanks for that.

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