"Becky needs"

I was visiting Marc's site today and was treated to a hysterical read, the result of a game he played on Google. This is how you play: Do a Google search for your name and the word "needs" together in quotation marks. (My search looked like this: "Becky needs".) Then you're supposed to share the five funniest hits.

I couldn't pick 5 so here is my Top 15 Countdown:

15) Becky needs... a GIANT DANCING RAT!!!
14) Becky needs the help of river pirates to free her brother.
13) Becky needs to get out the bathroom.
(True. What can I say? I'm pregnant.)
12) Becky needs a medical corset to keep her from physically falling apart.
(Also true.)
11) Becky needs implants.
(Not really true.)
Becky needs her pants changed.
(Definately not true. I may be pregnant, but I'm potty trained.)
9) Becky needs to do some clothes shopping, since she’s already been seen in everything she owns.
8) Becky needs more friends, since she’s so lonely.
(May have something to do with the clothes.)
Becky needs her coffee, especially when she bartends the previous night.
6) With all this drinking, Becky needs a smoke.
5) Becky needs to be rougher and uglier. Keeping her character so humane for over two hours is not believable.
4) Becky needs to get a blog so you all can see how great she is!
3) Becky needs to go back to her psychiatrist and tell them her Xanax, Prozac, Paxil or Zoloft isn't working.
2) Basically, Becky needs round the clock, one on one, care and supervision.
(And my very favorite, which is why it gets to be so long...)
1) Becky needs a home. Becky came to the SPCA as a stray 7 months ago. She had been found tied to a tree in a local park. When Becky first came to us she was in a highly stressed state. She would howl and bark for attention, and bite her lead almost uncontrollably. This, of course, has meant that it has been hard to find a home for her. However, determination and training has paid off. Her behavior has vastly improved in her kennel environment and she is now much more controllable when out and about.

(Hmm... not sure Glen would agree with that last bit...)
Although Becky mostly ignores other dogs when out walking, we do not think she would be able to live with other animals. Becky loves to cuddle on an armchair with staff and volunteers, however it is important to mention at this point that it would be no trouble training Becky not to get on furniture or to get down when told. Becky does not tolerate the antics of small children, so she will need an adult home.

Heh Heh. Isn't that funny? Now you do it... and tell me the funniest ones!


  1. You have a great blog here! I have a texas turkey hunting site. You can find everything about texas turkey hunting as well as info hunting rifles, scopes, bows, feeders, stands and more. Check it out when you can :)

  2. LOL. I had to leave this one on. Texas Turkey hunting! Sounds fabulous! Anyone in the market for a second honeymoon?

  3. No, I'm pretty sure that we don't know eachother. But I found your blog through people that I know. Janelle had a list of blogs that she reads and one of them was scotty d, my husband and I used to go to bible school with him and we also went to west portal at the same time. So I was just checking his sight out and checked out some of his favorite blogs to read and came across yours and found it easy for me to relate to. I'm sure we know tons of the same people though. Our best friends are from Martensville, Denley and Melanie. Don't want to mention any last names though. Anyways, I hope that you feel better and are welcome to come ON back anytime. Take care.

  4. so i did the little game too beck... in no particular order... or is there??

    1. Travis needs an adoptive family that will provide lots of love.He needs a structured routine everyday and plenty of praise and
    encouragement. He needs a family that will be advocates for him in
    school. A two parent family is preferable, however, Travis will also do well in a one parent family with lots of support.

    2. Travis needs to be the focal point

    3. Travis needs a stick that can keep up with him and still take the punishment that he hands out

    4. Travis needs to continue counseling to help him through his feelings of loss and separation.

    5. Travis needs a makeover

    6. Travis needs another beer

  5. i did it too...althought i probably should be studying...or doing dishes...or stopping noah from dumping over the cats water...

    1.Melissa needs maintenance manuals

    2.Melissa needs to board the blob ship that is hovering overhead...The extreme heat eventually causes the blobs to melt, so Melissa needs to plug the holes...

    3.Melissa needs a rehearsal disc for her Grease cast to sing along to

    4.Melissa needs her meds, and i'm sure Mikey won't get them for her.

    5.Melissa needs your help to understand tar

  6. 1.Trish needs some more angels.
    2.The last thing Trish needs now is a seemingly unsolvable case, one closer
    to her heart than she ever would have thought possible. ...
    3.Trish needs an intervention (or confronted with her drinking problem),
    4.Trish needs to always be in control of the situation
    and her men, just ask some of those who have fallen for the sultry Diva.
    5.Trish needs to take a hard look at her own trunk
    6.Trish needs your help!
    7.Trish needs me.
    8.Trish needs to get out more.
    9.Trish needs to do Playboy next.
    10.Trish needs
    counseling, who do you recommend?" ...

  7. now try..."(your name) is the most" at google...

    the things I do to avoid laundry!!!

    tks Becky!!
    love & laughter,

  8. what a ripoff. i need NOTHING! Nothing came up. I rue the day my parents named me ungooglable.

  9. However what I am the BEST at:

    I have come to the conculsion that Denita is the most recent and rodent reincarnation of Harry Houdini with a little Einstein thrown in just to make it even tougher on us humans.

    It's the only thing I am best at but still... HOW GOOD IS THAT! Who cares if I don't need anything!

  10. Hi i know this blog is way old but i couldnt resist. My name is also becky, and i tried this game and got:

    1) Becky needs a cactus shoved up her vagina

    (although I beg to differ)

  11. I know... What is wrong with people hey??? (Oh, just so you don't wonder how I noticed this new comment... They come to my email, so I SEE ALL!)

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