Here is the YouTube version. Tell me which way seems better to you. I haven't decided if I like the new blogger video feed or the YouTube one better yet.
The other one is in the post right down below this one.
UPDATE: Well, the consensus seems to be that the blogger version is better. Since this seems better to me anyways, because it keeps my videos more private, I am prepared to fall in with your wishes. Just this once though. Don't get too used to me being democratic. If you remember, I have dictatorial tendencies that put things like voting and egalitarianism way down on my list of ways to do things.
So I've taken down the YouTube version and left you with the blogger version in the original post. If you are disappointed you should have made your voice heard by voting. Now... Sadly, it's too late.
When people ask me if I've had a good summer vacation sometimes it takes me a while to think of an honest answer that doesn't take half an hour to explain. The past few months have been hard... But beautiful. Grampa passed away, which was hard, but so beautiful. Standing by his bedside singing with my family, smiling through our tears. Holding Gramma's hand by his grave while dragonflies floated above the soft green grass, listening to the sound of the hymns Grampa loved while the men of our family laid Grampa to rest in his last earthly resting place... So hard, and so beautiful.
And then there's Dad. Things haven't been the same this summer. Dad can't do a lot of the things he used to do, at least not easily. We didn't get to go camping like we usually do. There were no hikes around the lake, or rides in the boat. Still, we had time to be together, to laugh and to play. But even those times felt bitter-sweet with the worries about Dad's health always o…
Okay. It's not quite ready, but Mom's written a post, so feel free to head on over to Dad's new blog. I've put a link in my sidebar, or you could click here. (For all you sidebar-challenged people.) We will be giving that blog address to Dad's church and friends, but it will have no links back to our regular family sites. We are hoping to keep those as normal as possible. Although I will probably still mention things on here if I have something I need to work through, I won't be posting general updates here anymore. Just on Dad's site.
I'm hoping that allowing actual people onto Dad's new blog will shame me into finishing everything up... We'll see though. I just got the Big Brother live feed free trial. I have to keep my priorities in order.
My dad is going to the hospital. He has a cold. (So does Sam, but of course Sam has a healthy immune system to fight off a virus.) I guess they are planning on admitting him.
All I keep thinking is that I didn't get to hug him goodbye when we left Saskatoon. Neither did my boys.
UPDATE: So, since Dad was due to be admitted to start his chemo treatments anyways, he will be in the hospital at least a month. We were all hoping that the medicine he has been taking would do a good enough job on his cancer that they could harvest his stem cells without having chemo first, but I guess that didn't happen. I'm not sure if the chemo will start right away or if they will get his cold taken care of first. Tomorrow I will work on getting Dad's new blog up and running with updates and a guest book for you to send messages to him. Till then you can send well wishes to him by clicking here.
Sometimes I struggle with doubt. Sometimes parts of the Christian faith seem so bizarre to me. Unbelievable even. I struggle to hold on to my faith in the face of contradictions that can seem overwhelming.
There was a time when I had decided to let go. When I told God I didn't want any part of Him anymore. That I couldn't do it. I couldn't believe. I couldn't trust. I felt like I had given everything I could and that, in return, God had turned His back on me, left me in the cold and dark to plod on without any help. I felt that He didn't love me. That He couldn't. I felt that I had failed. I felt that I didn't have what it took to follow Him.
But. I didn't have the courage to tell anyone around me. I kept doing what I was doing. I kept going to church. I kept teaching Sunday School. I kept leading worship. But inside... Inside my heart was breaking. Inside I was swirling through despair because I felt that God had deserted me.
I finally took an evening and uploaded the tribute and some of the slide show from Grampa's funeral. You can view the tribute here and the slide show here. Sorry it took so long for me to get to it. I blame Dad. He's always distracting me with football stories and promises of late night movie parties.
Ahhhh... You have to love the weird and wonderful world of coincidence. Today we headed off for a trip to a nearby lake for a day at the beach with my parents. And who did we meet?A family with two little boys named Ben and Sam.
And...A family that I've been wanting to meet for a long time. Imagine my surprise when we pulled up to the park gates and I saw Marc paying for his park pass. I was so shocked, he was gone before I could say, "It's the pilcrow magnate!" But fate was kind and we had barely been at the beach long enough to unload the van before I saw the small familiar little face of their daughter on the playground with Ben, and following closely behind... The mother of all mothers. So I got to meet some blogging friends face to face for the first, and hopefully not last, time.
Of course, I was a little star struck. Smart people always make me nervous and I tend to talk too much when I'm nervous. Ben ran right up to their kids and asked if he could play wit…
I got this quiz off of Becky's blog. Again. (I think I may be a Becky-Wanna-Be. Which is ironic. Since I am one.)
I'd like to write a big long post about the whole "E" part of that quiz, but I'm tired, and my mom keeps distracting me by saying things like "What are you doing?" and "That looks funny." (There's a reason I never do well with the whole posting thing when I'm here.) Anyways. Let me just say that a number of years ago when I first took this quiz the "E" would have been a lot closer to 90% or even 100% than 50%. It's amazing to me how much I have changed since I've had kids, and the decrease in my E-factor is particularly stunning. I think I've even written about it before, but I don't have the energy to look for the posts, so if you're that interested in the boring introspections of this particular Becky, you'll have to hunt up the posts for yourself. (If you find them, will you let me know s…
Since I am feeling lazy today, but I still wanted to thoroughly break my no-post pattern, I stole this questionnaire from the Grrrl, who got it from here.
What is your favorite word? Chakins. What is your least favorite word? Panties. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Music. What turns you off? Stupidity. What is your favorite curse word? Frick. What sound or noise do you love? Rain. What sound or noise do you hate? People eating. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? Dolphin Trainer. (I'm so junior high.) What profession would you not like to do? Pediatrist. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? Welcome home.
Now you can do it and put it on your blog or in my comments section. I know! You're thrilled to the tips of your toes aren't you? That's me. A thrill with every post, and a post with every thrill... Or something...
Lately, I am all about Zellers. That store is quickly replacing Walmart in my affections. Walmart used to fill me with such joy. But then... They stopped being nice to me when I wanted to return things, and started seeming to enjoy the thrill of the power trip more than the thrill of taking back the crap I bought and then changed my mind about.They were out of everything I wanted to buy for about six shopping trips in a row and when we asked them to set aside the items we wanted and call us when their stock came in they promptly wrote down our names and never called, which was quite irritating when we came into the store days later to discover the items we had reserved either sitting on the shelves or sold out again.The quality and selection of plus sized and little boys clothes started to really lick boot. Don't even get me started on what it's like to try to shop for clothes for myself or my boys. It is obvious that Walmart prefers to have thin women with daughters as their c…