I Know Why

First, let me just say how humiliating it is to talk about this in public.

Second, let me point out that this is all Ang's fault, I wasn't going to watch, but she wanted me to so we could talk about it. And Mom was watching. And I really have nothing to do on Monday nights anyways.

Third, let me also warn you that there will only be a few of you who will know what I'm talking about, and fewer still who will be interested.

Now that I have that out of the way...

I know why Jake picked Vienna and not Tenley. He couldn't put it into words, but I can. And there's a good reason for that. He's not a real man. Well, he is, but he's not a manly man. And of course, he is completely unaware of that, so how could he explain it to Tenley? Or himself?

Anyways. That's what it all comes down to. Remember that first date with Vienna, and he was all crying on her shoulder? And how he was so scared, but Vienna was the brave one and helped him face his fears. Try and picture that happening with Tenley? You can't, can you? She is such a soft version of a girl. And Vienna is the opposite. And Jake needs a tougher version of a girl. Because he's a wuss. You can't have two weepy, softies in one relationship.

There it is. The mystery solved. The reason the Jake couldn't pin down, and why it didn't "feel right" with Tenley. He knew that he'd have to step up and "wear the pants" in the relationship. She would be the one needing the shoulder to lean on, instead of vice versa. So he picked Vienna, who could stand up for herself (could she EVER!) and be his shoulder to lean on. Awe. Kind of makes you want to barf doesn't it?

Me too.

I vow this people, I am NOT watching next season. No matter who is watching, or how much fun they promise me we'll have laughing at the show. My gag reflex is just way too strong for me to continue subjecting myself to this every Monday night.


  1. I am glad that I forgot to watch. I was already feeling a little queezy this evening.

  2. I knew it. I have it on my PVR and haven't watched yet. I knew he'd pick Vienna. Sad.

    If Ali is the next bachelorette, I'm watching. I'd bet any amount of money that they told her four episodes ago:
    "Here's the deal girly. We'll make you the newest Bachelorette, but you have to have an emotional walk out now. If you stay, he might pick someone else and you're screwed. If you go, we promise to give you a room full of hot men and you can make the rules. What's it gonna be?"
    She did leave for work. For her new job next season.

  3. I also have a much easier time watching the show when it's a bunch of men trying to win the girl. Rather than a spineless man trying to be a man. Call me sexist. You might even be right.


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