Calling All Inventors

All right, for today's post I'm going to tell you about two things that I see a great need for, and think that one of you should invent. And then give me a cut of your profits, since I thought of it in the first place. They are in NO way inspired by recent events.

#1 Silent pencil sharpener. Nothing disrupts a nice, quiet classroom like a loud pencil sharpener. Or even worse, a loud, electric pencil sharpener. Those things are just WAY too much fun, so it should also be somehow painful, or tedious to operate, so that the children aren't lining up one after the other because: "My lead broke! I don't know how! I wasn't pressing hard! I didn't do it on purpose!" (Yeah right, tell it to someone else kid. Momma didn't raise no fool.)

#2 Some kind of visor or mask for children to wear while you cut their hair. Because for the love of all that's good and peaceful and lovely in this world, we all get sick of hearing: "It's getting in my eyes! My nose is itchy! Ah!!!! It's on my face!" (If you'd stop whining and trying to get away from me this would take a lot less time, and you'd look a lot less weird when I'm done with you.)

#3 Child proof Kleenex box. No explanation necessary.

That's all I can think of right at this moment, but I know there's more. I'm telling you, my brain is a gold mine! Gold I tell you, GOLD!


  1. Regal used to sell a hair cutting/ washing guard thingy. Maybe you could make one using a dog cone or and old lamp shade.

  2. Hahaha! Sue, I can just see those kids with a lamp shade on their heads and Becky going at it, tongue hanging out and brows knit with concentration. They would still manage to wiggle or sneeze or something. It would make one of those lovely mother child mignonettes (gosh, I am not sure that I have the right word here and I am too lazy thins morning to check and I had to wrack my brain to get that out) that you see on TV form time to time.

    dismatel: to take apart

    or dismatel: disrespect Matel toy company by tekking the truth about all the bad things that have gone wrong with their toys in the last few years.

  3. It apparently is too early to edit as well.

    I am too lazy THIS morning

    tekking = telling Yeash, the keys are side by side.

    hotypto = a hoty potato.

  4. Can this be my blog post for today?

  5. LOL. I guess you just need to invent this stuff...


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