Where No One Barfs on Me

Hannah's been sick the last two days. She barfed all over the Walmart McDonald's yesterday. The whole restaurant went completely silent while she retched and cried. And Glen wasn't there. And while I ran to grab more napkins to clean up with she barfed again. It splashed all over the place. And then there were all the appalled looks that I tried to ignore while I wiped up all the vomit, and packed up my puke covered baby and miraculously un-puked-on food, and begged the boys to "Please, put your coats on. No we can't stay, Hannah's sick. Yes, Mommy will bring your food home, you carry your drinks." Parenting can be so humiliating sometimes.

So what does the pukey smelling mom on the go do for fun? She comes home and takes a bath to get rid of all the puke, and she settles her feverish baby onto her lap, and gets out her laptop to dress up in nice outfits on facebook. I even get my hair done. It's fabulous. And see that up there? One of my outfits even won first place!

Ah, I love cyberspace... It's so clean and pretty, and no one pukes on you, and you don't ever have to go to McDonald's again.


  1. That would be lovely, not going to McDonald's ever again. If I were you, I would probably not go there for a good long while so that the trauma you suffered becomes just a faint memory.

  2. That is hard! It is so heart wrenching when our little ones barf. Not fun! I remember when my little girl got food poisoning from some co-op oven fries. She throws up in the middle of the night on my husband and then later on me all the while saying, "I'm better" with her eyes full of tears. Oh my...

  3. Oh man. I am picturing that scene, and while the "I'm better!" line is making my heart melt, the rest of it is making me giggle a little. Only because we've so been there.


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